The past, the present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.

WanderingBrain

Even during the most riveting conversations of my life, my attention span is limited. My brain wanders. Often it surprises me with random internal blurbs that even I didn’t see coming—especially at work.

Random brain blurbs that are sometimes hard to keep inside my head during presentations at work

Do zombies poop?

Is there a limit to how long fingernails can grow?

Holy crap, is that a typo!! Just dust? Okay.

Somewhere, someone is named An Igma.

What’ll happen to all the ghosts when the world ends?

Can ghosts get to choose where to haunt?

Am I being haunted right now?

Are you sure that’s not a typo?

What if there really is a hamster in my brain?

Has anyone else’s brain just checked out?

Crap! That is a typo!

How long is standard sloth fur?

Who first looked at an oyster and thought “yummy”?

Someone in this room doesn’t like me.

I hope my doppelganger is living a good life.

In an alternative universe, I’ll bet there’s a version of me that’s made out of glitter. Or cotton candy.

Are aliens are looking down at us and laughing?

How much would my husband pay me to eat a pound of wasabi?

How long will it take other people to see my typo?

Where does the word ‘zombie’ come from, anyway?

Sugar, Sugar, cocoa puff. Sugar, Sugar pie.

Has anyone ever memorized all of the lyrics to Amazing Grace?

Yes! My typo flew under the radar! Wait, does that mean no one reads this stuff?

And these are when I’m giving the presentation. Secret confessions of friends and colleagues show that I’m not alone in this struggle.

Neither are you.

6 responses to “My brain has a big mouth”

Half a 1000 Miles

April 1, 2016

Because we release words into the world, we can get obsessive about typos, so I feel ya. I read and read and read, and then read it out loud, and then read it backwards and still have damn typos. Of course everyone sees them and thinks I am stooooooopid.

Reply
1. Erica
  
  April 1, 2016
  
  I print out hard copies and read through them, word by word, tapping a pen or pencil underneath each syllable as I go. And still, typos crop their ugly little heads up sometime.
  
  We aren’t stupid. Typos are just that stealthy.
  
  Reply
mydangblog

March 31, 2016

When I was a classroom teacher, I used to ask my students, “Is your brain such an uninteresting place that you have to spend every spare minute staring at your phone?” Like you, my brain is a much more bizarre and random place than anything the internet can provide!

Reply
1. Erica
  
  March 31, 2016
  
  AND your brain can say things inside that you don’t dare release into the world. It’s a safe zone, mostly…hopefully…usually…?
  
  Reply
Willi

March 30, 2016

Haha your brain is amazing. 🙂

Reply
1. Erica
  
  March 31, 2016
  
  Thanks! She does like to have her moments.
  
  Reply

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Hello,

I’m Erica Wall.

Award-winning copywriter.
Real-world creative writer.
Multi-cup-a-day coffee drinker.

Answers to a cat.

Resolutions for 2026

Block off three hours a week to write
Delegate more to reduce overwhelm
Clean up and clean out home office
Practice finishing what I start
Practice good habits and let results be whatever they’ll be

“If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that.”
> Stephen King

“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”
> Ernest Hemingway

“Cut out all these exclamation points. An exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke.”
> F. Scott Fitzgerald

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
> Douglas Adams

“Creativity is intelligence having fun.”
>Albert Einstein